It’s Friday evening and there’s a light drizzle over Cubao. I sit outside a restaurant people-watching with two cold beers on the table. I couldn’t find a seat in a cafe so I decided why not get a drink instead. It’s aning Friday after all. Ewan ko, suddenly my head started spinning this afternoon --- not spin as in headache but spin as in aning-aning. Bigla na lang naging restless ako. Parang may gusto akong gawin na hindi ko maisip kung ano. Inisip ko baka panic attack. Maybe that’s it. A panic attack. So I told myself while showering to relax. Relax. So I jerked off.
I went out wearing my favourite red shirt. Iniisip ko how appropriate. I have a date with the boyfriend and I’m wearing red. Passion. Love. Sex. Lust, etc. When I got to Cubao I realized that my shirt doesn’t match my shoes. Not that I’m a matchy-matchy type. The truth is even if I write for a makeover show I couldn’t care less about what I wear. Well, I care actually pero hindi lang ako nage-effort. Sometimes I look decent but most of the time I look like a construction worker. A constru. A constru na may konting hitsura. At least may hitsura. – Insert laugh track here. Haha.
So I bought a new shirt. Suweldo naman eh. I thought I’d look yummy in white. So that’s what I bought. A white undershirt. Yes, I do look yummy now. A yummy constru. – Insert sfx here. Toink!
Then I realized kumo-color palette lang ako. Like Chito Rono in The Healing. Terrible idea. I mean the color-coding. So obvious. Clashes with the story instead of helping it. Anyway, yes I started the night wearing red and now I’m wearing white. Purity. Holy? What else? Pero white could also mean nothing. As in blank. Or evil. Yes, it could also mean evil.
Naaliw lang ako sa thought na yun. Na kumo-color palette.
So I’m aning right now and already on my 2nd beer. And I’m hungry. Bad combination. I’m also thinking about my dogs. Sana maka-imbento na ng cellphone where my dogs can text me. But I already can imagine the text messages I will receive from my dogs. Kahol! Kahol! Gutom na kami! Kahol! Kahol! Umuwi ka na. Kahol! Kahol! Leche! Yes, I imagine the text messages to be like a telegram. Incidentally, my dog Chichi who sleeps beside me on my folding bed thinks she’s my wife. Kapag nilalatag ko yung folding bed nandun na kaagad siya sa may unan. In fairness, siya naman ang parati ko talagang kayakap. And when I go up to pee she would give me a look that says: “Darling, san ka pupunta? I’m sleeping. Come to bed na.”
Nakaka-aning lang. Bow.