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Showing posts from June, 2008

Durhnaaa!

Internet shop:

Nagpatugtog yung shop attendant na girl. Una, yung walang kamatayang version ng "I'll Always Be My Baby" ng nakakalibog na si David Cook. Ayaw niya. Nilipat. Naging kanta ni Rhianna, "Umbrella." Ayaw pa rin niya. Lipat pa rin. Naging kanta ni Chris Brown. Cute siya. Si Chris Brown, I mean. Kamukha niya yung dating P.A. na pinagnasaan ni MJ.

"With you, with you, with you, with you, with youuuuuuuuu...!" kanta ni papa Chris. In fairness, nakakaindak siya. Made me wish I was going somewhere to get drunk (but i've got nowhere to go cuz I'm broke shit - chorus ng left brain ko). Kaso nang muling nag-refrain, "with" na lang yung narinig ko. Tsuk! Tsugi si Chris Brown dahil lipat pa rin ng track si shop attendant na ghel.

Ang bagsak. "Kung Malaya Lang Akooooooo!" Sino ba yung kumanta nito? Alam ko jowaers siya ng isang dancer sa isang noontime show. Sila pa rin kaya? Putris, napapaindak na sana eh. Come to think of i…

battle royale + geek suffering + conrado de quiros = salvation?

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I knew I was going to have a crappy day when the bus that I jumped into was playing Battle Royale on DVD. I struggled not to laugh as the Japanese kid with a chainsaw for a leg ripped her opponent into two. I could just hear the passengers' jaw dropping on the floor with each violent scene. It was so horrible that I almost wished that I was going to Taft and not to GMA so I could watch the entire movie. I went down the bus giddy with delight. I was so damn amused that I knew at that moment I was going to have a bloody Saturday.

Fast forward to 9pm. I was walking home feeling a little dejected. The winds were already howling by then and I could feel the storm coming in. I felt like Harvey Pekkar. I was like a character on some Daniel Clowes comic book. I realized that I like reading stories about geek suffering but I never really liked being a geek. I'll be honest, I've always wanted to be a beauty queen instead. I was already a few blocks away from our house when I saw som…

dahil super bored ako

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nang dahil sa shampoo, a true story (pramis)

Ilang taon nang mag-jowa sina Ron at Wendy (hindi nila tunay na pangalan, of course). Mula kolehiyo hanggang magkatrabaho, magkasama pa rin silang dalawa. Ilang anniversaries na rin ang kanilang sinelebrayt at ilang beses na rin silang nag-break up. Pero matatag pa rin ang kanilang samahan, or so they thought.

Isang araw, habang naghahandang maligo si Wendy, nakita niya sa kanilang banyo ang isang bote ng Clear. Oo, Clear, yung bagong anti-dandruff shampoo na O.A. sa publicity na parang binili na ang ABS at GMA sa dami at dalas ng kanilang advertisements. Nagulat siya at dali-daling dinukot ang bote ang pinuntahan ang boyfriend.

“Ano to?”

“Shampoo, obvious ba?

“E anong nakalagay dito?”

“Clear, yung bagong anti-dandruff shampoo na O.A. sa publicity na parang binili na ang ABS at GMA. Bakit?”

“Oo, alam kong Clear ito. Fan ako ni John Llyod at every time kong nakikita yung commercial na yun kinikilig ako kaya alam kong Clear ito pero ano to?”

“Ang ano?”

“Basahin mo nga ito…”

“Clear… for Men. O a…