silly love songs


He storms out of the room. I scream. He closes the door and runs down the building. I stay in the room, seething in anger. Ang sa akin lang naman ay maging praktikal ka. I am so angry I bury my face in the pillow. From beneath, I could still hear our neighbor singing a saccharine love long, his horrible voice echoing all over the empty room.


Saddled with enough stress to last a lifetime, I bang the bathroom door. I scream and throw things on the floor. He remains silent in our room. I barge in and slumps on the bed. He turns off the PC and climbs out to the balcony. I wait for him to come and be with me on the bed. He stays firmly seated in his seat. The sun sets in the horizon. Little by little, our small room is enveloped in darkness. Finally, he comes in. I look up and reach for him.


We were listening to Billy Holiday. It was around lunch and all the doors and windows in our apartment were open and the blazing sunshine filled every corner of the room. I remember it felt like a Sunday. I was trying to start on a new script and my boyfriend was cleaning our room. We were broke and could hardly afford lunch if not for my mother who gives me an allowance every week. It may sound like an old Kenny Loggins song but we were actually happy. The warm weather, the languorous air, the dust mites that float around as my boyfriend sweeps the dirt off the floor, my boyfriend deep at work, jazz, and the fact that I was completely aware of what was happening made everything perfect.

April 23, 2008


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